Nov 28, 2014

How You Get The Girl

 “Diamonds are held under tons and tons of pressure, extremely high temperatures of fire and shuffled under shifting of tectonic plates, for a long, long time! Yet when they come out from there and are put on display for their beauty; does anybody stop to evaluate the diamond based upon all the shit it's been through and say "Remember that disgusting hole it used to be in? I bet it was hell in there!" No, people don't remember where a diamond has come from; they just see the beauty of it now. But it wouldn't have become so beautiful, you know, if not for all of that! So why should we look at other people, or at ourselves and evaluate them/ourselves based upon their/our pasts? Shouldn't we forget that? And only see the beauty that is in front of our eyes? Whatever it was, it made you beautiful! And that is what matters!”

- C Joybell C

I mentioned a few posts back that I had quite a busy week since despite feeling sick, I had certain commitments that I have already confirmed my attendance for and one of them was on a Friday night where I was chosen to judge the Mr. and Ms. College of Home Economics at U.P. Diliman. Along with my fellow judges who are, I have to say, talented and respectable in the industry were Alma Concepcion, Arnold Galang, Albert Andrade and the Dean of the College of Home Economics Dr. Aurorita T. Roldan. I was quite honored to be part of a panel of such big name and revered personalities and I was more than happy to represent the social media and blogging world and made sure to try my best to objective as possible. Personally, I used to be invited to judge pageants in universities but rarely accepted. However, since I wanted to show my support for the college, I went for it and I was glad I did. The pageant wasn't all about who looked better or who had the most incredible gown but a large percentage of the rating system was on their ability to communicate and answer questions impromptu (which we asked them) and also in their talent and portion area. It was such an amazing experience and I got a bit nostalgic about my college days. In this day and age we live in and in the industry I belong to, there is so much emphasis put on how you look that it is almost the one main facet our lives must revolve around. I find it silly. On the get go, this is also why I hate meeting people randomly like in a bar setting or in a club because everything is so objectified. First impressions revolve around your exterior appearance and while I may seem fashionable and cute, I think my personality is more of what makes me... me. To relate that to my outfit, I try to incorporate how I feel as much as possible to my outfit and well, this dainty ensemble seemed perfect for that day.

White Jacquard U-Neck Dress: Ever New (similar HERE)
Beige Sling Leather Box Shaped Bag: Bally
Pearl Accessories: Mikimoto
Satin Pumps with Rhinestones and Silver Heel: Aldo (Also worn HERE)

Photos by: Celyn

Aside from the "Little Black Dress", I think that one other closet staple everyone must own is the "LWD" or the "Little White Dress. Of course, I would then argue that everyone also needs a "Little Red Dress" and so and so but that's just because I need an excuse for keeping an item in my closet. But in all honesty, one can never go wrong with a black and a white dress ready in their arsenal. While the Little Black Dress is traditionally vampy, more versatile and something you can wear especially at work or on a night out, the Little White Dress is more exquisite and delicate and would be the perfect dress to thrown on for a fancy day out- be it a brunch, afternoon tea or simply a beautiful day out and it has proven to be very handy since (unless you were it at a wedding), it is appropriate for semi-formal and cocktail dress code events happening during the day. I have disposed of my old party girl clothes and hopefully, the people who got them would give them a great new place... and I did have a lot of such in point: Outfit 1, Outfit 2, Outfit 3, Outfit 4, Outfit 5... and then so much more. But anyway, I have a sense of relief knowing the were purchased to be worn out and taken for a ride around the city for those who were like me back then. Now, I go for more classic silhouettes when buying clothes and I think this white dress pretty much shows that since it is so different to the dresses I used to wear. (A side effect of getting older, I reckon.) But anyway, it fit me perfectly, I love the cut and the shape and most of all, I loved the delicate jacquard print which made it more intricate and elegant. I thought it was the perfect outfit for attending the pageant I was judging as it was very classic and conservative and at the same time, very neutral and subtle, ensuring that I wasn't stealing the thunder from the lovely contestants. I stuck with the neutral color palette with pearls, a jeweled pair of nude pumps and a matching leather Bally bag in a neutral tone. I also went to style my hair in a very understated, toned down and polished manner to add drama and some consistency to the entire ensemble. Suffice to say, I felt like a princess in this dress in my personal fairytale. 

I find that since I love looking well and dressing myself up that I am misconstrued as a shallow and superficial and I hate that this stigma exists- no matter how advanced and modern we claim our world to be. Stereotypes like these, as annoying and baseless they are, are unfortunately still prevalent and all I can do is yearn for the day when people stop objectifying other people based on looks. It is incongruous that I am saying this when my blog is all about fashion and most of the time, I present my best foot forward when I post photos of myself. But photos, as much as real we'd like to believe them to be, are two dimensional and can easily be altered (Hello, Photoshop!). I think everyone must trust the vibes and gut feel that they get... because energy doesn't lie. True happiness and contentment shows from within and I think people who see me have been sensing a much better aura from me as I am radiating nothing but good vibes. I have to say that it took quite some time to get to this place of alignment. “I've learned, that not all worth is measured by price. I've found so many gems that didn't cost me much!” and I have to agree with this saying since in terms of monetary value, you can't buy experiences and you can't pay for life lessons. I have always said that when it comes to giving me presents and gifts, I prefer things that don't require a great deal of expense but rather took some effort to make. I know myself well enough that anything another person can give that is in material form is something I can I know I can give myself. This is why my definition of spoiling is giving me your time. Give me experiences and memories... anything I can learn from.

 We have made all made mistakes and we all encounter hardships and difficulties but I think that having gone through these is ultimately what makes us or breaks us as people. I think we all have the same beginnings and we have faced the same amount of struggles in our life.  However, the reality is that diamonds are only lumps of coal that stuck at it no matter how much heat or pressure they faced. It is the capacity to realize that we were not built to break and that most of the time, the most beautiful, exquisite and precious things in the world come from worst case scenarios and these will make us or break us. There will be times that things hurt so bad that we might not ever get over it. There will be times that bad things happen that we have absolutely no control over and are helpless about and nothing quite makes sense as to why it is happening to us. And there will be times we might feel broken that we can't anything get anything tight and we were probably doomed for failure from the start and we feel alone. I am not immune to these feelings and I have personally gone through them. I also see people experience these setbacks on a day to day basis in my work so I know for a fact every person has their own battle...just in different forms. No one is exempted from going through these feelings...that is what makes us human: going through highs and lows and trying your best to persevere. We need to stick it out no matter what happens- no matter how heat, flack and external and internal pressures we get. Do realize that when you've surpassed these challenges, more will come because after all, it's hard to be a diamond in a rhinestone world. As for me, I'm still a diamond in the rough... but I am getting there.

...And that's how it works...that's how you get this girl

xx, JL


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