Jun 30, 2014

Because I'm Happy...In Stripes

I am enjoying the last few days of sun left before monsoon season starts and the chilly weather starts to fester. I am one who always loved the sun and the warmth and I think this was the perfect day to head out in this absolutely easy breezy outfit with a somewhat "nautical" feel. I am obsessed with everything nautical the reason being that since it'smealready.com (my self deprecating term to convey how absolutely head over heels I am with myself... and yes, I think I am "the one"), I realized to get an anchor tattoo at the back of my ear. Not because I refuse to sink, but that's a nice metaphor. Since I am literal, I got this tattoo simply because my initials "JL" seem like an anchor when joined together... so come to think of it, perhaps I did take my self-absorption to the next level. After all, I am singe and if anything, this is the best time to rediscover myself and dedicate my focus on me. When I started doing that, I figured there were so many reasons to love myself and that nothing is wrong with that as long as your self-love doesn't inflict pain on other people. So if you are willing, allow me to teach you how to fall in love with yourself.

Based on past experience, there seems to exist an unfair stigma that goes with loving yourself. Trust me, of this, I am an expert. People write you off as conceited and stuck up. It's almost like it is frowned upon that you like who you are... you are labelled as an egomaniac. So before I dive into the whole concept of loving yourself,  allow me to explain to you what it is not- so when you do try it out, you do it well. You see loving yourself does not in any way mean projecting an overwhelming sense of superiority and self-entitlement. You know you are amazing and no, you do not need your license plates to sat #1 QUEEN OF THE UNIVERSE to prove your point. You do not need your Facebok status to say: "Love me, hate me, I am a bitch and if you can't handle it, GET OUT!!!" That's just trying too hard. Everyone walking around proclaiming that they are such a precious gift from heaven and deserve to be treated like royalty (ie. primadonnas) are actually, in reality, insecure, delusional and kind of mean. People are surprised that I treat my staff in such a loving and respectful manner and why I am do not feel so entitled to walk some meters from where I was dropped off even if I am in sky-high heels. Loving oneself is not synonymous or translate to thinking you are better than everyone else. People who are actually comfortable in their own skin do not need to shout it out from the rooftops or in grandiose ways. It is just evident in their day to day decision making. Divas who expect everyone to cater to their needs and have such a high regard of being better than anyone else are actually the most insecure people in the world. If you were secure in who you are, after all, you wouldn't feel so entitled to get special treatment. Feeling good does not come externally but instead, internally. And yes, sometimes, you need to stand up for yourself and shut down their condescension and haughty behavior by your conviction. You should not allow yourself to make you feel bad about what you like. In order to love yourself, you need to stand by everything you do. Do not ever make apologies from the things that make you happy (unless it is an illegal drug or an abusive masochistic relationship.) Have confidence in your decisions. Also, the best way to find out if you do truly love yourself is re-examine closely the relationships you have. I've known a lot of people (and was one of those people) who have high self-esteem but still managed to fall for people who will treat them like crap. It's a giant "WTF?!?" about their personality. How is it possible to be a certain way in every facet of your life, and then act completely contrary when they get into a relationship? We've all done it. I know I sure did. We've all disrespected and violated ourselves for the person we "love." We've all found ourselves going against everything we believe in for some companionship, a automatic +1 to any event and an "I love you" from someone who doesn't even know what it means. Sad to say, it is an undeniable fact that when we are seeking the love of someone else, we forget to love ourselves...and it should not be that way.

A foundation of self-respect is necessary. You need to lay out the kind of foundation that allows you to look in the mirror without feeling like a hippo or listening to mainstream pop music and singing to it without shame. As long as you have that base level of self love- you can and you will survive the missteps, the bad friends and the assholes because at the end of the day, you like yourself. You know you are in good company. You don't care if you have a meal out by yourself, walk around the mall or watch a movie only with yourself and are content in spending a weekend at home- solo. You would and would love hanging out with you... Sure...I mean, why not? I must confess that all of this is not as simple as it sounds. Absolutely none of this is easy. You will betray yourself and your ideas at some point and the world will break you into pieces. The key to recovery lies in the fact that you always have to know that you want the best for yourself and anything but is simply unacceptable. After all, as I constantly remind myself in times of self doubt, "It's me, myself and I, and that's all I got in the end."

Striped Navy and Cream Sheer Chiffon Dress: Mango 
White Spaghetti Strapped Inner Dress: Mango
Cross Necklace: Therapy 
Gold Ankle Strap Metallic Shoes: Zara
Midnight Blue Bag: Givenchy (also worn HERE)
Hair by: STYLD. Hair Extensions

Photos by: Celyn Jaravata

xx, JL

With that in mind, since it is SALE season, give yourself some LOVE and treat yourself with some shopping... MANGO is offering up to 50% off for their END OF SEASON SALE!
PS: You can also shop ONLINE!!!

Available at stores in the Philippines and online.
*Maximum discount applied to the MANGO collection.
For all other lines, the discount will be equal or lower.

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