Anchor Yourself To Something Special

Everything changed the day she figured out that there was exactly enough time for the important things in her life.

I have been on this one woman mission of reinvention ever since the middle of the year, when I woke up and realized that somehow... my life didn't make sense to me the way I needed it to. I had matching tattoos done on the left side of my ribcage with my sister Katie with the word 'evolve' and it is the single one tattoo I don't think I will ever regret because I consider myself forever changing and evolving into more of me. It is very easy to get brainwashed by the standard set for me by the society but somehow I managed to break free... (Cue in this year's very meaningful Halloween costume) There are exactly 17 days left in this year's calendar. I am thankful. I found myself this year... not realizing how lost I was. Currently, I find myself so free that even if someone put me in cuffs, I'd still feel my freedom. I find comfort in being comforting. I think at one point, I got lost in the trend of keeping up with the trends until one day, I decided that I was the trend and that I should only be keeping up with was myself. The past years, I think I have been laying my foundation on something weak and shaky... like relationships and other people but I think I have somehow transitioned. Another meaningful tattoo that I got was behind my left ear and it is an anchor which is of significance for two reasons: (1) since my initials "JL" put together resemble an anchor so much, it might as well be my own sigil and (2) because despite how many reasons are thrown at me, I refuse to sink. Life's toughest storms the strength of our anchors... and I think mine has proven to be tough enough as it has been put to the test so many times.

'Cause Darling I'm a Nightmare Dressed Like A Daydream

Okay, so I don't quite know how accurate this title is but granted that I am self-deprecating, I wanted to post this as it was one of my favorite lyrics to that new very self-deprecating Taylor Swift song, Blank Space, which is what almost everyone is talking about... along with THAT photo that broke the internet that just had this weird effect on me because I felt like there was too much oil involved. Okay, not to veer off from topic, I always liked Taylor Swift as an artist and love her songs (even her unreleased ones) but before, as a person... not so much. I always felt there was something she was hiding with her squeaky clean image and since I am one of those people who love to admit my faults before anyone else could point them out, I felt like she was hiding something. With her new look, sound and image with her 1989 album though, I've begun to see a more human side to her and I liked it that she went over and beyond that and exaggerated how she is portrayed and showed off her flaws in such a self-deprecating way that made me really really like her. I think as humans, we are all flawed. But it is up to how we accept them, react to them and use them (sometimes to our advantage) that matters. So right now that she is showing a more fun and "hey, I'm also human" side... I like her as a person too. I have to admit  I haven't quite given myself enough time to recover after the fuss of last week since the minute I was released from the hospital, I found my schedule full of appearances and commitments that I have signed off to even before I got sick. Granted that these commitments involve an advocacy that is very important to me, I couldn't live with myself if I were to just cancel last minute so after I checked out from being admitted... I found myself planning my wardrobe for the days to come which involved me in very demure, dainty and classic pieces since these engagements I booked all involved education, which as you know is a very important cause to me and something that I will fight for no matter what. I decided to postpone the time needed to recuperate so I may attend to these functions because I am professional and I will go above what is expected especially if it involves this particular cause. I'm human, I am flawed but here I am trying my best to represent... and in this ensemble, it would be hard to go wrong with the entire representation thing as it was in every way elegant. This is my usual outfit for daily life as I want to represent myself in a very put-together and classic way especially as I represent one of the most rapidly growing scholarship and educational foundations as I am its Executive Director. As I am an advocate of situational dressing, I try to be respectful of the environment I am in and the cause I am representing and that involves dressing up in a manner that is graceful, dignified and refined. 

On Standards, Taking The Stand and Standing Up For Yourself

"I'm not going to do it. I'm not going to wish for a perfect life. The things that knock you down in life are tests, forcing you to make a choice between giving in and remaining on the ground or wiping the dirt off and standing up even taller than you did before you were knocked down. I'm choosing to stand up taller. I'll probably get knocked down a few more times before this life is through with me, but I can guarantee you I'll never stay on the ground."

 -Colleen Hoover

It is a popular saying in fashion that every woman must dress like they are going to meet their worst enemy. I never really made sense of that and I never found any reason to believe in that. Now that I go to court for hearings, it still quite doesn't make sense to me. Probably because I never really dressed up for anyone other than myself. Simply put, I dress up for me but with the consideration that I am appropriate enough to make an effort to show the people who I am meeting that I respect them enough to have come up with a well-thought of outfit and not be sloppy. Don't get me wrong, I am always appropriately dressed for almost anything as the occasion calls for but I don't really put into consideration what other people will think when it comes to what I want to wear. I am an advocate of "situational dressing." But that is about as far as it goes for me. Personally, I dress up for a said situation/occasion the way I want to and the day I wore this outfit was dedicated to all-white and powder blue, which to me was inspired by a very cool and calming color palette which was the complete opposite of the events that were to transpire that day. You see, I had to take the stand.