Only the Marvelous: We aren't picture perfect but we are worth the picture still...

To all the women with the flaws, know it's hard my darling
You wonder why you're lonely and your man's not calling You keep falling victim cause you're insecure
And when I tell you that you're beautiful you can't be sure
Cause he doesn't seem to want you back and it's got you asking
So all you see is what you're lacking, not what you're packing
Take it from a man that loves what you've got
And baby girl you're a star, don't let 'em tell you you're not
Now is it real? Eyebrows, fingernails, hair
Is it real? If it's not, girl you don't care Cause what's real is something that the eyes can't see
That the hands can't touch, that them broads can't be, and that's you
Never let 'em see you frown
And if you need a friend to pick you up, I'll be around
And we can ride with the windows down, the music loud
I can tell you haven't laughed in a while, but I want to see that crooked smile

- Crooked Smile, J.Cole

I have to say, I sometimes give myself admirable advice. ..but I am incapable of taking it...or following through. As I have mentioned so many times, I am so self-deprecating, I almost always know when to admit when I am wrong. I don't see the point in denying. Sometimes, I want to scream to the world: "I am not perfect! I make mistakes...life didn't come with instructions." just to appease the maddening crown but in this day and age where almost everything you do is subject to public scrutiny, I have to say, some people have serious guts to berate other people when they themselves are so flawed in so many levels. It is tempting to call them out on these, sometimes, but then what good would that do to the world? How different am I from the said person and ultimately, it's like I am not taking my own advice. You see, advice is difficult, especially when it comes from ourselves. Even if we cannot put our advice into action, the thing is, we don't need to neat ourselves up about it. That's the thing about honesty...it is so absolutely refreshing when we can be honest, even humorously honest, about ourselves! Too often, we are so preoccupied protecting ourselves that we do not dare risk letting others know we aren't perfect. Of course, most of the time, we are actually the only ones fooled by our masquerades, but we make ourselves believe that others are fooled,too.

I hate condescension. I hate pretenses and I absolutely abhor people who think so highly of themselves. I have been very vocal about it because all too often, I think being entertained by putting people down (people you do not know especially) is pathetic. I mean, at the end of the day, who are you to say what is what and who made you the damn expert? Ultimately, I think it's all about labels. Yes, even in a society where problems are of severe levels (it's life and death people), I find myself realizing that we never really bothered to get over high school... issues and problems included. I find it sad, really, especially when we have that herd mentality and everyone has to follow the clique. The labels, exist, and in more specific levels. At one side, we have the indie bohemian skater people who think anyone too "mainstream can't sit with us," and on the other side of the pendulum, we have the "self-absorbed, devil-may-care, I will do what I want to do and flaunt it in your face" crowd. I think it is quite clear which pole I belong to. After all, I do shave and enjoy being hairless and I like pop songs. I love fashion, I like dressing up (I am not saying I am an expert, only Anna Wintour can make that claim) but I do own Chanel and Hermes and I wear Herve Leger much to someone's disdain (I do not know how this affects her life), and I also own Secosana and Parisian and I love them all the same. I also don't make a title of someone's blog entry such a big deal, like life or death depended it. I do not tell what people should do... I do not condemn and tell people to die because "they tried to identify with me which is synonymous with trying to sit with me", I am too busy with being myself to do that. More so, I do not tell people what they should and should not do. PS: Criticizing someone for what words they use or title they come up with... That is not what an everyday hero of any nation would do... Ultimately, I think that when your own morality is in question, it is best to keep quiet and not condemn. Sometimes, I think we are so busy finding mistakes in other people because we don't want to see ourselves clearly, because then we would see our flaws all too well.

When one can be honest with themselves, they usually know very clearly what it is they need and what it is that is destructive to us. The trick is: can we listen to ourselves? Are we capable of following our own good advice? Can we let ourselves see foibles and laugh about them? After all, no one knows us as well as we know ourselves... (That's what I think anyway). Naturally, we are the persons who are most capable of seeing ourselves clearly.

It all boils down to this: Are we courageous enough to let ourselves see ourselves and be honest about what we see?

As for me, I can see clearly now.