Adore You

 

Ribbon Silk Taffeta Dress: Karimadon | Cream Hair Accessory: Aldo | Swarovski Rhinestone Encrusted Pumps: Aldo | Pink Diamond on Rose Gold Teardrop Earrings: My Collection | Pearl Bangles: Mikimoto | Peach Jewel Bracelet: Forever 21 | Miniaudiere Clutch Bag: Lanvin

Talk to any surgeon and they will tell you that the hardest part of the job is knowing when not to cut. Ask a chef and they would muse the hardest part of their job is knowing when to stop putting  seasoning. Approach a makeup artist and inquire what the biggest challenge it was that they came across and they would readily say that it was knowing when to stop applying cosmetics to a client's skin. And of course, like most girls who have experienced this more than once in their lifetime, I think you don't need to ask a hairstylist what the hardest part of their job is: it's knowing when to stop chopping off hair although visual representation and not words can demonstrate this point I am making more graphically. That is so with any job... perhaps with every activity. I see people who gamble (not that I do, I never have and I never will learn how to because I like my money where I can see it... hanging in my closet) who were at the top of their game... only to end up losing everything. The popular saying goes, that the house always wins, but I think the "establishment" is not to be blamed here... it's human nature not to know when to stop.  

As with every profession, the same principle applies in fashion design. Fashion designers are always encouraged to fine tune and look at each and every single piece and aspect of a piece. We are trained to be aware of even the tiniest detail... we are all about the intricate things. The hardest part isn't creating the design... the basics are something you learn, adding on the details: that is where the challenge lies... Ant it's preventing oneself from over designing, it takes will power: putting down the pen and the marker and not adding any more elements, additional frou frou or that one more layer of fabric. I know that as self-proclaimed "artists," designers think the more over-designed a piece is (and with additional unnecessary elements such as a twisted asymmetrical bow strap with two kinds of neckline, three different fabrics, pleats and an uneven hem) the more versatile it is. But that is not always the case. Sometimes, the most disastrous dresses I have seen are those that are "trying too hard." The many elements I just mentioned: a bow, a twisted front, an asymmetrical A-line hem, a different fabric etc. end up being confusing and ultimately, it just doesn't work. I know this because I have seen one too many creations such as this. This is why my major rule is: when in doubt, skip the frou frou and go for the classic silhouette- it is tried and tested, the downside to that is you will be playing it safe. If you must, like me, not conform, make sure you give your input. Dresses that are one of a kind are not something you just buy off a rack or arrive in and expect to fit perfectly. It takes more than just one fitting, this I can guarantee and while most people are not as detail-oriented, neurotic and maselan like me when it comes to what I wear, do save some energy for these traits especially for milestones in your life... like your wedding.

 

And so, if you can read between the lines, you know what I am talking about. I've been receiving a lot of queries regarding this particular dress that I didn't wear or even have a hand in creating and to address this non-issue for once and for all, I would like to say that I am not the dress' wearer nor can I speak on her behalf or the dress designer's spokesperson, and I am not being paid good money to act as their PR person so I won't take it upon myself to speak for such an atrocious thing. I do not know what possessed any individual to create or wear such a thing but I am getting tired of getting nonstop inquiries about it, I want to address the issue once and for all. I would never wear a  dress like that on such a special occasion and I will also never know what would possess me to agree to put that thing on over my head, even on a normal day. But to save everyone time and to avoid people going on a hate spree (it is Christmas after all and well, I want to give you MY OWN take on how I would wear a white cocktail dress with the same details...almost), let me show you how I would wear a little white dress (which I rarely do since I prefer my white dresses long.) I have of course no plans of wearing this to my own wedding... a semi-fancy 2-star restaurant dinner, perhaps... but when accessorized properly, worn with confidence, designed appropriately and steam- ironed, a white dress can actually the fashion's next biggest gift to us... after White Blouses, Little Black Dresses, Black Pumps and Oversized Sunglasses, that is. Now can we please all go on and continue with our lives and put this dress disaster issue to bed? Much appreciated.

PS: On a side note, I am so proud that I only got this dress ON THE SALE RACK for P499... 

The same applies for living in general. Once in a while we find ourselves in a fine frenzy and have to juggle projects. Traditionally, we are rather very proud of ourselves for having slipped creative worked in their between our chores and obligations- domestic and otherwise. I beg to disagree: I do not think we deserve A-pluses for that. You see, I hate to say this, but people tend to look down on me and my ability to work on my own time and pace, as compared to a 9 am- 5pm job. What people do not realize is that people who work outside the house are not the only people who are obsessed with work. Women who are home full-time (such as myself, managing my own business and all) rarely have time for ourselves or our creative projects either (unless your job, like mine, calls for that). After all. life and being a basic human being is a job that takes twenty-four hours a day. There is always something to do. Our greatest skill is not perhaps in getting things done, it may be in juggling projects so we look like we are getting things done, so that we feel better. But take precaution. Juggling projects is one of the symptoms of those who do too much... of those who cannot stop and say enough. Nothing has room for everything all at the same time, and based on my experiences, those who try to do so much and put in too much, aren't only paid very well... sometimes, they get hit on the head with balls they have in the air. 

In line with this, as this is quite a very festive and holiday inspired post, let me relate that to the frenzy I am sure the holiday season comes with. We need to realized holidays and frantic are not necessarily synonymous. We see the holiday season approaching and we immediately feel exhausted and overwhelmed. Let's see: we have to maintain our usual workday and in addition, shop for gits, brave the season's heavy traffic, decorate the house, do all the extra holiday packing, cooking, baking, attend additional social functions, and all at the same time... look great. The result: for some of us "the season to be jolly" becomes the season t wipe ourselves out. I would know. As someone who has quite a few quirks, neurosis and control issues, I have learned through the years to dread the holiday season. But, this year, it was different. Perhaps this was a good year for me to stop, take stock and see what is really important for myself and for my loved ones this season. I know I absolutely LOVE the traditions (ie. the eating, the eating and the more eating) but in my 3rd trip to the E.R. in a week's time, I came to ask myself, which ones can I continue in order to be healthy? I also learned to ask for help (from my boyfriend, my mom, my FOSSIL and my brother) and for the first time, stopped trying to do anything myself. 

Doing the holiday season sanely is part of our healing process as we end the year. Grab that opportunity this season. This year, this holiday season, it is still not too late: we have the opportunity to find the meaning of PEACE-  peace within and peace with the world. 

 Merry Christmas!

xx, JL