The Sun Ain't Shining No More

I wonder if it is possible to be in touch with our true courageousness without being in touch with our spirituality? Dorothy Bernard said, "Courage - fear that has said its prayers." and what a wonderful definition of the word! We know how to be foolhardy. We know how to take risks. We even know how to put ourselves on the line. But sometimes, we need to stop to reflect, we need to believe that the work we are doing has a meaning beyond the tedium of the everyday. I was going through some inner crisis in the past about my work situation and I felt as if I cannot see some larger connection in what I was doing. Inevitably, I experienced the feeling of loss and emptiness. But then things started to pick up and about 3 years ago, I was privileged to be chosen as Channel [V]'s Designer of the Month... They did a store feature and short interview (where I was struggling with my voice as I had decided to party up and celebrate the taping the night before which ended at 4 a.m.) and the taping was scheduled at 7 a.m. so there I was... hungover and hoarse and perhaps the only saving grace was that I donned a pretty Herve Leger dress... Now how is that from Triple H? Anyway, after the interview, the producers asked if I had a song preference for my video and automatically, I said that I wanted (yes, I was very assertive and on point about this one) the song to be "The Sun Ain't Shining No More" by The Asteroids Galaxy Tour simply because the song was so my style and it captured the kind of music I get inspired to when designing. I am a big fan of bands with a female lead singer- this band counted and other bands like Oh! Land, Soho Dolls, The Ting Tings, The Kills, Goldfrapp, Ladytron, The Pretty Reckless etc. The first time I saw the video played out on television (they played it out about every hour), I was ecstatic and in a way, I was able to find that what I was doing in fashion was something that I could find connection to... with myself and with other people... as people who had seen the video started to message me that seeing me on that feature made them want to pursue their craft and creativity and it reassured them that despite the process of being your own employer would be a daunting task and quite the risk, they saw that there was so much merit in doing something they were passionate about.

 

If you want to hear the song, here's the music video...

In so many ways, this song is so memorable and significant for me. I have watched that Channel [V] video so many times and I am still not tired of the song. I associated it with such a positive experience that I had so you can imagine my excitement when I heard that the band was part of the lineup for The 7107 International Music Festival, since I've been wanting to see them live for the longest time. It was nice to have an opportunity to get to relive that which was for me quite personal which was why I just could not understand why certain people  had to be so condescending and negative about the event and even wrote negative reviews and criticism about it...even before the event even happened. That, I find, is my problem with holier-than-thou and self-righteous know-it-alls... they have such a rigid point of view that everything that does not go along with their way of thinking is deemed wrong and so beneath them and what is worse is, they are very vocal about their condescension, as if they really want you to feel bad for believing otherwise. They have not realized or have perhaps gone through a transcendence of some sort to know that every experience is different for people and everything may mean something to them... that they will probably never comprehend as they have not lived it...and that sometimes maybe they should just allow people to experience things without having to be so preachy. I mean, come on, it just ruins things for the rest of us.

Anyway, this was what I wore to that day I saw the band play LIVE over at Clark, Pampanga. It is, in so many ways a complete opposite of what I was donning earlier that day (the Coven-inspired ensemble) but I felt this look was more appropriate to go out in as it was pretty easy and comfortable to wear.  Add that to the fact that I wanted to look as fresh as possible since this outfit was going to last me until 1 AM, when the festival ended. So, I layered a lace semi-sheer top over my favorite Glitterati bikini called "The Culture Clash" bikini which I had reproduced especially for me in an army green and earthy tone. I paired these two earthy pieces with a pair of off-white shorts and an acid wash denim vest and a pair of brown boots and automatically I felt the 'desert wanderer' vibe  for me. I think it also works perfectly with my new lightened locks. I found it the perfect outfit to wear to a music festival as it was easy to wear, breezy and not too body tight and that it just made sense, granted that it was held in an outdoor sandy/grassy open area. And when I got to catch The Asteroids Galaxy tour performing... can I just say... I was in a complete haze. It had brought back so many pleasant memories, life-altering realizations and a new way of seeing things which had enlightened me 3 years ago... and which continues to enlighten me to this day.

Semi-sheer Sleeveless Lace Top: Style Stunner Manila | Garter Lace Shorts: Forever21 |
 Army Green Bikini with Waist Straps: Glitterati | Acid Wash Denim Vest with Lace Trim: Style Hub PH | Feather Earrings, Ivory Tooth Necklace and Arm Cuff: Cultus Chi Chi | Oversized Sunglasses: Wear Vintage | Brown Studded Combat Boots: Romwe.com | Stacked Beaded Hamsa Bracelets: Therapy

Here is what I realized ultimately which ended my internal crisis: I know that somewhere deep inside me that even if what I am doing doesn't exactly have a great cosmic meaning, the way I go about it and the interactions I have with others around my work can give it meaning beyond itself. Regardless of what I do, I have an opportunity to make it sacred work and more so, the freedom for a sacred opportunity. We have to have the courage to know how to soar through the tempering fires of fear, reach deep into our spirit and find the possibility that is there. We have to learn to have the courage for the dailiness of life. We have to have the courage to admit our mistakes and not give in to the luxury of self-castigation. We have to have the courage to be honest who we really are to the people we love. We have to have the courage to admit that we've had too much and the courage to want to take a break from it all. When we face our fears and weaknesses and let ourselves know our connection to the power that is in us and beyond us, we learn courage. Courage is an everyday thing, much like spirituality. And everyday, we can only ask to have courage to transform what we are doing into something sacred.

I hope that made sense.

Anyway, to those of you who are wondering what the Channel [V] video was all about, you can watch it here:

xx,JL

 Here is something to look forward to!
Get a chance to raid OUR closets and find a home for our loved items THIS WEEKEND. Entrance is free and we'll be serving some food and drinks to enjoy as you shop! Complete lineup of WHO will be allowing you to raid their closets will be announced soon but expect to get the best from MNL's stylistas. ALSO...YOU CAN GET TO ACTUALLY MEET & GREET all of us! We'll be having items for both MEN and WOMEN and KIDS... Oh and... PETS!